The Time Capsule of My life

Growing up along side innocence made me ignorant
Life never made any sense but I went along with it
Protected from the world and the corruption
I lived isolated on an island where problems consumption
Led to volcanic eruptions
I used to cry watching my parents argue and fight
Now I become transparent amongst the demons at night
School and first crushes
What was cool and my mom's notes in my lunches
Life was cruel because the thought of death made me sick to my stomach
I remember my mamas used to watch me and my sister every summer
Now she is always missing and when I see her it seems she doesn't know how much love her
My great grandma hammered my head out of a fence when I was a baby
We used to do homework together, watch Heidi, and I would patiently await for what she would make me
My aunt Gloria was a visit to the bakery
A movie theater we would watch horror flicks, fragile minded every scene would break me
I went to three schools before high school
Made plenty of friends, but all I think about is that we grew up too soon
Reminiscing on my past and the laughs no one would understand why I am the way I am
Remember when I put that basketball in my hands
For the first time I felt alive and a passion burned inside my eyes
Day and night I would be outside, imagine me trying so hard if I failed I would cry
Back when life was simple
My dad and I played video games and grew my first pimple
Back when my best friend Brandon was there and a girl was something we feared
Before our lives separated and his presence disappeared
When we played ball and went to each others house every weekend
I still cannot let the truth sink in
Before I felt heartbreak and lived with a heart that is bleeding
Before my parents divorce was something I believed in
Before I questioned life's meaning
When God was apart of my life
When praying didn't feel wrong but was right
I want to go back in time
Relive the moment my mom took me to the park and fell off the slide
I knew she would take care of me and everything would be alright
Before I knew thoughts of suicide
Before I grew accustomed the dark and turned off the light
Back when my sister and I used to play games
and I didn't change
The years of our youth I won't ever get back
By now it is much too late
We used to pretend it was school and I was the teacher
Her and my cousin were students
We run outside in our sneakers
That life I never knew I would lose it
Christmas at our house
Wishes granted on behalf of loves account
Break ups and divorces
Pay cuts and abortions
Screams and tears voices
The devil and in pounds in large amounts
So hard to block out the sounds that keep coming around
Before I knew the reason my grandparents weren't together
Before I knew he cheated and her heart wasn't severed
Now lust is pleasure
It is a must by any measure
My soul is stained
I am fine but my conscience feels pain
I just thought everything would always be the same
Memories, in the past they will always remain


- Jigsaw

Jigsaw

It wasn't until recently i made a connection between jigsaw puzzles and my life. As innocent children we would search for pieces to come together and form one picture. Whether we received help from others to find the pieces or put them together our goal was to complete that picture. Sometimes we loose those pieces leaving the puzzle incomplete forever. Just like a jigsaw puzzle everyday of my life is just another piece putting together the picture of who I am and my life all together. Along the journey of my life i have been influenced and helped to put me together. Some pieces are a perfect fit, some are dull, some are uniquely shaped, and other pieces have been damaged. If you asked to see who i am i could not show you because my puzzle is not yet complete because I am searching for pieces to complete it. I love hip-hop/rap. I love to write. Whether it is labeled as lyrics or poetry i have written in composition books, my iPod, and phone for over two years and has become an outlet to get away from reality. So the posts I put up are most likely going to be these kind of works. The way I look at it and hope you do as well, these are pieces of me. Pieces of my personality and my experiences. The way I feel or portray life. My thoughts are as radical as black and white, but can be shades of grey. They are just the things I think about. I am hoping you will discover more about the person I am. Maybe, I will learn something about myself as well.

- Jigsaw